A gentle reminder to slow down for the people who matter.
⸻
I’m sitting at the station, waiting for my train as I begin to write this.
Train time is my time.
I always look forward to it — the moment I allow myself to slow down.
But today feels different.
The goodbye came with a long, heartfelt hug —
a wake-up call of sorts.
⸻
When slowing down turns into wishing
Living consciously and slowing down are high on my list of priorities.
Yet they tend to slip onto my list of wishes,
because I have to keep reminding myself of them.
I tend to dive headfirst into life —
and into anyone who briefly crosses my path
looking for a listening ear or a shoulder to lean on.
Time then becomes scarce.
My heart and mind sometimes feel overcrowded,
as if I’m stretching myself to the limits of my presence.
⸻
The giving trap
There’s nothing wrong with giving, caring, being of service…
But at times, I take it too far.
It’s not easy to admit,
but I’ve learned, as the years go by,
that my giving isn’t always purely selfless.
Yes, I want to be a good person — that’s my intention.
But that giving, that caring, that being there…
especially in the past, sometimes bordered on the unhealthy.
It also came from the good feeling it gave me.
In other words, I drew part of my self-worth from it —
and that’s anything but selfless.
It was, in part, about me.
But worse still, it often came at the expense
of those who permanently live in my heart.
⸻
The moment that stopped me
And I felt that today.
I was talking non-stop,
and when we said goodbye, there was that hug again.
It stirred far more than either of us had expected.
Lost in my own world,
I hadn’t noticed her need for closeness.
Gulp… gulp… GULP.
Because that’s the last thing I want.
⸻
What I (painfully) learned
Our train should always have a carriage reserved
for those truly close to us.
If we want them to feel welcome, loved, seen, heard, and acknowledged,
they belong in the honorary carriage —
always, and without a ticket.
No matter how many other passengers you let on board,
make sure they can always ride along.
This week, in more ways than one,
life reminded me to pay closer attention to that.
⸻
When you’re the passenger
Because besides being drivers,
we’re all passengers too. ❣️
If you stand close to someone — or wish to —
and feel that their train has passed you by,
pull the emergency brake.
Send a signal.
Those who love you will slow down, stop, take a detour —
out of love. ❣️
Because you are not too much.
And the other isn’t too busy.
You matter.
⸻
Our trains often rush on…
but it’s wise to stay alert to the signals
that ask us to adjust the timetable,
or even hit the brakes —
to open the doors,
and make room for those who belong in our honorary carriage. ❣️
After all,
it’s not about how far or how fast we travel,
but about who we truly share the ride with.
⸻
✨
Written on a quiet platform — somewhere between what keeps me moving and what makes me stop.
Love,
Maaike
Love in action 
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